After the bubble would burst, I’d look behind me at the shattered mess of a stunned husband and crying children. I would stand there ashamed of my actions and distraught over the woman I had allowed to come out. Visions of my girlfriends, and women I knew, would flood my mind. The images of their perfect lives were like nails laced with condemnation sealing me inside a coffin of shame. I couldn’t stand the woman I was, and I didn’t dare let those with perfect lives into my less than perfect life. I couldn’t reach out to my friends; these moments were too disgraceful to share with another.

The isolation of nowhere to go was almost worse than the episodes of rage. The solitude of my thoughts left me alone to have extensive conversations in my mind, using words I wouldn’t speak over my worst enemy! I believe it was the isolation that brought me to my knees. But being on my knees left me feeling like an aberration, completely vacant inside. God was not healing me, and I was not changing!

I was tired of finding myself time after time saying the same line of repentance for the same outbursts of rage! I wanted to find permanent freedom from this insane life I was living. I begged God for healing, not for my sake but for the sake of the ones I loved the most! In my eyes, I was destroying the very people I would otherwise lay my life down for! But, would God deliver a crazy woman?

Stronghold was originally written as a workbook curriculum from a women’s Bible study I wrote out of my healing journey from Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder. But, I never really felt like God was finished with that study or me. However, with all of the books out there, why write another? I kept asking that question each time I felt God pursuing me for more to be placed on the pages of Stronghold. As I wrestled with what God was tapping into, He began to unveil His design for this particular story.

The Stronghold project is a conversation starter and a community builder. There is nothing more isolating than shame, and shame thrives in the dark places we’ve sealed off from others. For the Christian community emotional and mental disorders are some of the more hidden and misunderstood places in people’s lives. For those who don’t suffer, it’s hard to connect with those who do, and for those who do it’s hard to connect with those who don’t – a barbed wire of judgement seems to separate the two sides. The Stronghold project will dissolve those harmful barriers and begin the conversation that will connect woman to woman.

Stronghold is the journey of several women, including myself, who’ve bravely trekked out of captivity and into the liberating Stronghold of God! The book unlocks lies and exposes fears, but most of all, it walks us chapter by chapter into the authentic stronghold of a safe and loving God! There we find that His presence restores our lives to how He had always intended to them be!

Over the next few weeks, I will share little clips from the book before our release in March. The 8-week journey has a companion video of stories and conversations from other women who have battled with their own forms of captivity, from drugs to the lies of lust. As you hear their hearts you’ll discover two things: One, you’re not alone even though you’ve felt alone. And two, God is no respecter of person. What He’s done for us He plans to do for you, too!

Looking forward to traveling the road with you. If you know someone who you feel might benefit from this journey, I encourage you to forward them this clip.
Beth_Signature
21 replies
  1. Brandi
    Brandi says:

    Beth,
    Friend, this is a book I need to read! And I know so many others who are trapped in the cycle of shame. I can hardly wait to see what God is going to do through your obedience!!!

  2. Gina Petrotta
    Gina Petrotta says:

    Sweet Beth…I cannot even come close to begin to express to you how this small snapshot of your book has shed light into dark corners of my heart, life and spirit and brought with it a sliver of hope as well…so looking forward to reading more…thank you

    • Beth
      Beth says:

      Gina! You have so encouraged me with this post! To think He is already using just the teaser makes me excited to share the rest and watch what the Lord does! Love you friend don’t give up the fight… keep pursuing Him!

  3. Kate
    Kate says:

    My dear Beth…how brave you are! I love the authenticity in your words. We have a very authentic Lord who will go down deep into those dark places with us to pull us out…so glad to see you putting that on display so that more women can know this amazing gift.

    To anyone else reading these comments…share the heck out of this! Our church body needs authentic in a very real way ♡

    • Beth
      Beth says:

      Oh Kate, isn’t He faithful! Psalm 40, He pulled me out of the miry pit and set my feet upon solid ground. He put a new song in my mouth a song of praise. Many will see and fear the Lord many will put their trust in Him! Oh how excited I am to see what God does through this one step of obedience! Thanks for sharing your thoughts friend!

  4. Georgie
    Georgie says:

    Beth, what a blessing!! Daddy God is gonna blow women’s minds with just how BIG He is!! He cares so very much for us…even the crazy stuff! We’re not a surprise to HIM! He CAN and WILL use cracked pots. We just gotta trust Him with the ugly side and allow HIM to make it beautiful! I’m excited to see the clips to come and for your book in the Spring!

    • Beth
      Beth says:

      The story of my life, he took a great big cracked pot and Remade her! 🙂 Thanks for taking the time to share on here Georgie. I look forward to seeing how God uses the messed up pages of my life for His glory! 🙂

  5. Marie
    Marie says:

    EXCITING!!

    I know this will help and encourage so many people.

    Sometimes our hormones cause us to be people we don’t like, want to get rid of or otherwise are ashamed of.

    Looking forward to getting/reading and sharing.

    @spreadingJOY
    Marie
    #BloggerCareGroup

  6. Cindy Barclay
    Cindy Barclay says:

    Beth! How I enjoy your blog and now I’m looking forward to the release of your book- Stonghold. There is power in the Name of Jesus to break every chain- I’m looking forward to 2015 being a transforming year- I’m pressing into His love to tear down the strongholds of anxiety and fear! Love your fresh, authentic, compassionate words. hugs and blessings to you and yours

  7. Maggie Reynolds
    Maggie Reynolds says:

    Excited about reading this book Beth…..just the excerpt alone, has brought back memories……I can so relate to what you are saying…….Thanks for writing this…look forward to reading the entire book……

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